[Family Corner] Where are WE when Our Children Are Growing Up?

Leonny

 

Today I was blessed to have heard some thoughts on parenting and how ‘urgent’ it is for us parents to ‘actively be involved’ in the lives of our young children.

And I’d like to share some of these thoughts with you today.

Whether we really are aware of it or not, our world offers the following concepts and values : Materialism, Consumerism, Selfishness, Hatred, Vengeance, Greed, Envy … just to name a few.

Sure, we can tell ourselves that we are adults, and we can make the ‘right’ choices for ourselves.

We can choose to love, and not hate.

We can choose to deny ourselves and our wants, for the good of others.

We can choose to feel content with what we already have, and not indulge ourselves in stuff that we don’t actually need.

Etc. Etc.

BUT.

How about our children?

Our children grow up VERY QUICKLY, and the question is, WHERE ARE WE when they’re growing up?

The reality is, our children live in the same world as us.

The world strongly and constantly presents its values and concepts to our children too, whether we let it or not.

Advertisements on TV, newspapers or magazines. Posters and banners along the streets. Daily happenings and interactions with others. Again, this is just to name a few.

And it is so very easily for our little ones to just ‘follow the flow’ and be ‘drowned’ in everything that the world offers. 

(Another worry is that, many parents may not even realise that it’s happening to their families)

So.

Can we protect our children from all this?

Not completely.

But, we sure CAN do something.

Today, I was made to realise once again that as parents, we really are racing against time! 

We can choose to be ACTIVELY INVOLVED in nurturing and educating our children.

We can choose to genuinely CARE about what the children are reading, watching and playing.

We can choose to BE THERE for our children and carefully select the stuffs that our children are exposed to.

For example, we sure can choose to :

– Not let our children spend too much time on electronic media (computer games, etc), and instead … encourage actual interactions and loving playtimes with siblings and friends

– Not let our children watch movies, music videos or TV programmes that are not age-appropriate, or that encourage violence (though they’re ‘cartoons’ and ‘animated movies’)

– actually spend time with our children, … chatting with them, getting to know their struggles, finding out the kinds of things that cross their minds when things happen. Also, instilling values, and letting them see how despite us being sinners, we ourselves try our best in living out our beliefs day by day, etc.

Today, I was made to realise once again that as parents, we really are racing against time!

Our time with our children is seriously limited.

Our children grow up VERY QUICKLY, and the question is, WHERE ARE WE when they’re growing up?

Are we actively involved in their lives since they’re little?

Or are we ‘losing’ our children, because we increasingly are detached from ‘their world’?

If our relationship with them has never been quite ‘good’ (eg. They feel we hardly care for them nor spend time with them during their growing up years anyway), … connecting with them when they are teenagers will even be more difficult.

Once our children are in their teenage years, there’s really very little that we can do as parents.

By then, their minds are much more set than years before.

We also cannot ‘enforce our authorities’ like the way we still can when they’re little.

They tend to listen to their friends more than us parents.

They will want to choose ‘whatever they feel is right’.

And, if our relationship with them has never been quite ‘good’ (eg. They feel we hardly care for them nor spend time with them during their growing up years anyway), … connecting with them when they are teenagers will even be more difficult.

(Sure, we can still instill values and all, but it’s more like … sharing our advice with them?)

Today, I was reminded of the importance of being there for my children (and, of praying FOR them).

And, I too was reminded of how ‘scary’ my days as a parent can potentially be in a few years time, IF I am not connected to my children today.

Being a parent is never easy.

Because we ourselves have limits. Flaws. Weaknesses.

May God grant us all the wisdom, patience and strength always.

Hope you have a great week ahead, everyone.

 

8 Comments to "[Family Corner] Where are WE when Our Children Are Growing Up?"

  1. ah  28 November, 2012 at 03:14

    no children but have many many ‘children’
    totally agree with u

  2. Dj. 813  28 November, 2012 at 01:50

    Danke Leonyn…
    Unsere Kinder sind schon Gross.

  3. Kornelya  27 November, 2012 at 22:31

    I’m a good companion for my child, as she grows, I reluctant to give her , her own space, I want to be part of every single moment of her life, something that she doesn’t like.

  4. J C  27 November, 2012 at 21:47

    Yes, definitely right! No need that long for so many years, not too long ago, just 6 years ago when we moved from Medan to Jakarta, our boys were still so small, and now they really grow fast, time is running so fast…

  5. Handoko Widagdo  27 November, 2012 at 19:16

    Anakku udah gedhe-gedhe

  6. [email protected]  27 November, 2012 at 16:44

    ……….. no children…..

  7. Alvina VB  27 November, 2012 at 12:49

    Thank you for sharing Leonny. Reading your article, remind me of these quotes:
    “You know your children are growing up when they stop asking where they came from and refuse to tell you where they’re going”. ~ P. J. O’Rourke
    “Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see”. ~ Neil Postman
    “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” ~ proverbs 22:6

  8. James  27 November, 2012 at 12:01

    ONE, Our Children

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